The Art of Doing Nothing_July 2020

Oct 22, 2020

What’s Popping People!

 

What’s Popping is a love note to my email list! It is my way of letting you know my thoughts on some topics, give you the rundown on where you can see me and let you know about any special offerings I have going on. You will receive this from me once a month. Hit me with an email if you have any questions, thoughts or topics that you would like for me to cover. 

What I'm Loving: 

Brujas of Brooklyn -  40 day Kundalini Sadhana - From June 1st to July 10th, I participated in a daily practice with almost 100 other women. Engaging in a series of kundalini yoga movements geared towards aligning the energy of the solar plexus, I saw shifts in my digestion, mood and awareness. My personal confidence grew, as well as connection to my intuition. If you are interested I suggest you follow them on IG or sign up for their mailing list to get more information. 

RAW Women's Group - In June I started a 3 month journey with 20 women to learn about ourselves and practice new skills to promote healing and personal growth. Although a sizable larger group, there are a lot of small group exercises, which permit them to get to know and support each other. I know they show up consistently to hear from me. But the way they show up for each other...teaches me so much. It reminds me that no matter how broken we believe we are, we garner strength for others. We have lessons to teach others. We want to support others and our healing typically lies in collective strategy and community. If you think you may be interested in the next cycle starting in September click here.

The Unruly Retreat: Virtual Edition - Join me and other fabulous Black women wellness practitioners as we gather together to learn from each other and have some fun. Click here or more information.

 

What I've Been Reading: 

Queenie - is an excellent book about understanding how your history impacts your way of being and finding yourself in the process. 

The Business of Lovers - if you are looking for something a little racy and fun, I highly recommend this read about a man and his journeys in family, love and sexual pleasure. 

Opening to Spirit - This is my newest read I am starting today. At a brief glance this book helps you to understand your emotions and body from the perspective of the chakras, as well as eastern spirituality. It not only includes the information but also skills and exercises that can support you in your growth. Feel free to join with me and let me know what you think. 

 

Ways To Connect:

After a long period of being full I finally have some openings for individual coaching and group work. To find out more about these services feel free to send an email to [email protected] and complete the appropriate form(s).
 

I have also resumed doing distance Reiki to get more information click here

 

This month’s topic is:

The Art of Doing Nothing 

 

"I really did not conceptualize rest as my friend." 

I know it's been a while since you've heard from me. I've been learning to master a few things...but really my primary new fun thing to do is...nothing. 

I come from a family of hard workers. Work, and the fruit of your efforts, was prioritized in me growing up. I realized recently I've been working since middle school. Before I could be employed, I was volunteering for credits or just to be outside of the home. I got my first internship at a local court house when I was 15, worked at Smith Barney when I was 16, and took extra classes while volunteering until I graduated. In college I worked as much as I could and that meant 1 security job working full time hours and another part time job while making mostly A's and B's and taking more than a full course load. After school I've worked up to 4 jobs at 1 time, while being a mom, a partner and every thing to every one who I perceived needed me. I really did not conceptualize rest as my friend.

Even family outings meant I needed to do SOMETHING. I always had a book, I was always planning something, always looking for ways "to do." I remember going on an outing with my aunt's church 2 years ago and asking what was there to do at the park. Her response, rest and enjoy each other, seemed so foreign. But I went anyway. Although I really enjoyed myself I don't think I mastered the art of rest until recently. 

As the days are warmer I find myself outside. You see, I'm fortunate enough to have a home with a large lawn. Although not blessed with a backyard, my lawn is rather big as my home sits on a corner lot. I have found myself on the lawn under the sun just laying there. Recently, I visited Georgia and discovered my love of sitting on the porch and watching the rain. I've found myself wondering how I can do this? When did this happen?

"I always had a book, I was always planning something, always looking for ways to do." 

As I traced my trajectory with rest, I realized that working and business were attached to my traumatic experiences and what they taught me about my thoughts and needs. I didn't feel that my thoughts or body were safe to be in. Somehow I thought my brain would catch up with me and destroy it all. If I sat down long enough I'd get behind, I'd be sad, I'd get angry, my body would need something. Sitting with myself became a betrayal of the denial I thought I needed to stay safe and be well. In addition, my incessant work ethic is really rooted in my need to take care of myself and need to learn to trust that rest does not limit my ability to care for myself. In fact, it ensures that I'm caring for myself in ALL ways. 

In my healing journey, I started to understand that my thoughts and feelings  were information to be used to help me. With meditation I could sit with them and get curious. The curiosity taught me what I needed and stillness gave me permission to consider opportunities to give it to myself. I've also learned that rest is one of THE ways I take care of myself best, freeing me to do things I enjoy, but also to rejuvenate my mind and my spirit. 

"In my healing journey, I started to understand that my  thoughts and feelings were information to be  used to help me." 

So...that's where I've been more often: still, and curious. I've done it in the bed, in the tub, on the office floor, bedroom floor, my car, daybed and more recently...on the front lawn, laying in the sun. Giving myself permission to feel, to connect to my thoughts, to release what I can and to focus on being well. 

If you are struggling with rest, think about why you think you need to stay moving, thinking or doing. What would life be like if you could rest and release those fears?

Virtual Hugs,
Melissa

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